My Unforgettable Love
My Unforgettable Love
Chapter 1
It all started one day when I met that one guy whom afterwards had changed my whole life. In the first sight itself I felt a strange attraction toward him. I was confused, I couldn’t decide whether it was love or all about attraction. Whenever I would met him I would feel really happy and I completely forgot about the world and other people. Was is love? Days went by and I realise I was changing. My attitudes, my behavior, my dressing sense, my talks, my walks every single things started to changed and soon I realise I was falling in love with him slowly slowly.
Then came his birthday, I was so happy and I decided to send him a message. He even replied to my message and the next day my dad slapped me just because that guy told my dad that I sent him some indecent message. I thought about it & wondered how can he do such a thing? Was I wrong or was he right? And I tried to hate him but I failed. I didn’t know what to do but as the time passed by I realised that my love for him was increasing.
I’ve developed the habit of writing diaries in his name. Everyday I would write something romantic about him I even marked the date on which I would saw him or get to see a glimpse of him. He was someone whom I yearned to see and talk with but unfortunately we stopped talking with each other after that incident. We met each other at many functions, dinner and wedding but we acted as two strangers. And that was hurting me so much that i would end up crying at night whenever I think about it.
Months passed quickly, we continue seeing each other like strangers. It was hurting but I thought it was best for me to ignored him & to stop hurting myself. I would not pay attention to him and I would do anything just to avoid seeing him. But one thing is for sure our relationship had a different meaning, we didn’t love each other nor hate each other.
Two years went away just like that, I used to think about him and cherished all the wonderful moments we’ve spend together. I found myself happy spending my life in his memories. I knew very well that there was no chance for us to be together but everytime I wanted him to be by my side. I was suffering inside but no one really cared and it was becoming painful for me.
Exams were coming nearer. I had to forget about him completely & try to concentrate more on my studies. But I always thought about him! I pretend to ignored him when I actually cared for him. I was tired living this double life, I wanted to talk to him.
Therefore, I tried to contact him through a social networking site. We eventually became friends but he still didn’t know who I was as I befriend him under another name. We were becoming best friends gradually but at a time he got suspiscious about my identity so I had to tell him the truth & he simply said he hate me. I told him that I didn’t force him to love me but he cannot stop me from loving him. He didn’t say anything but we were in contact and we were chatting just like that but at a time i felt he didn’t want to talk with me so I decided to go far from his life. But i really hope that one day things would change…
Chapter 2
We didn’t talk to each other again in life. After five years, I got a proposal and guess what his elder brother wanted to marry me. At first I was wondering what’s going on in my life. Was it going right or totally wrong? But then I realised my parents, my families all of them were so happy for me. And I was happy in their happiness. I thought if I said ‘yes’ to that proposal my life would change & I will have somebody in my life who truly cared about me but after i thought much I was scared thinking that my first love would be living under the same roof with me. How will i manage if he stays in front of my eyes everytime? Will i be able to forget my past & love my husband as much?But I went ahead with a yes. We start knowing each other and it was becoming interesting gradually we were becoming close to each other & after two months we finally got engaged….
My first love name was Zayaan & my fiancé name was Inayat.
Inayat & I would meet regularly after our engagement and we were really happy about us & our future. Whenever I was with Inayat I would forget about all my problems, I was so comfortable with him. I really enjoyed his company.
We organised family dinner so that our family could sit together & discuss but the real secret of organising such type of meeting was that we would have dinner together sitting next to each other.
But at many occassion when Zayaan would come together along with the family he would look very upset and as if he wanted to tell something. But I didn’t pay him attention as all of my time was meant only for Inayat, because I loved him so much. Since I met Inayat, I tried my best to forget Zayaan & I even succeed but sometimes I just thought about him & there would be tears in my eyes but however life goes on!
Then Inayat’s family & my family had to decide about our wedding and the date was fixed on the 10th October. But before that Inayat & I went out for our wedding shopping we had to buy dress, suits, shoes & accessories. We were quite excited, as after six months we were about to get married.
The day passed so quickly & finally our wedding day came and I was really happy but nervous too. The nikah went well alhamdulillah & we were heading towards the reception hall for a reception & dinner organised on the occassion of our wedding.
(Alhamdulillah- by the grace of God)
Then it was time to leave from there. I was so sad & upset because that is the time when you have to leave your parents, your siblings, your house, your everything to go into a stranger’s house & make it your own home. I started crying & crying then my father came he hugged me so tight that i didn’t want to leave him i wanted to stay with my parents. But unfortunately that’s the law of nature, every girl has to leave their own and go into their in-laws house.
And it was the last time i was saying goodbye to them when Inayat & i sat in the car. We then reached home & i was very tired. I wanted to rest and sleep but then i realise i was in somebody’s else house & i was upset but Inayat explained to me with love. He said that i’m his princess & i can do whatever i want but i just have to stay in my limits. He was the only one who understood me so well. I was so happy to have somebody like him in my life, i was blessed.
That night we were so tired. We had to sleep early as the next day there was a lot to do. The next morning i woke up for the fajr namaz and then went back to bed & seeing Inayat’s face while there was a big smile on my face. He kissed my forehead and greeted me with a sweet voice. My happiness knew no bound as i waited for this day for so long. Then i went to take a complete bath & i had to prepare breakfast for all the family members.
I thought i’ll make some toast & tea. But then i found out that everyone had a different meal. Mom & dad like to have roti and tea whereas Zayaan likes to have sandwich with jam only & green tea. Inayat drinks only black coffee & i preferred to have only a cup of tea.
Chapter 3
My day went well as Inayat and i remained together, he showed me the entire home & explained to me how things goes on and in the evening there was a dinner at my maternal home & all of us were invited. I was dressed like a princess, long dress with pale make up & fabulous jewelleries & Inayat was just like a prince in suit and costume. We were the most elegant couple. Arriving there, we were served cocktail juice & the atmosphere over there was extremely happy and joyous. Everything seemed to be perfect.Everyone treated me like a guest & i found it very funny as this was my home too but i was being treated a little bit more special which i was very happy of. The meal was outstanding eventually because my mom prepared it. Inayat really praised mom & i feel so fortunate to have somebody like him in my life.
After having dinner, mom called me alone in the kitchen and she asked me:
— Are you happy?
I stood still for a few seconds then answered:
— Yes mom i’m very happy can’t you see i’ve the world’s best husband for myself.
— But i know you truly never wanted to marry with Inayat
— Mom it’s all about the past now, i really love Inayat & i want to spend the rest of my life with himself
— Oh my daughter, i wish you all the happiness in the world, stay bless always.
I felt emotional when mom told me that and maybe somewhere mom knew that i fell for Zayaan but destiny didn’t brought us together. However, a mother is a mother & she knows her children better than anyone else does. And then we went outside to have dessert with the others. We had a really good evening among family members.
We returned home quite late. We went to bed early and at night Inayat & I were simply having some romantic talks and hugs…
We fell asleep soon and the next morning i woke up early & by my great surprise my sister-in-law was in my room waiting for me to get up. I thought something happened but then i found out a really pleasant surprise. Quickly i packed mine and Inayat’s bags because we were going on a honeymoon. It was a gift for us from his sister Aanya.
We felt so happy. Our destination was to India, can you imagine? I was too excited to go over there ever since i was a teenager. But never got the opportunity to do so. Thinking about India made me think about yummy & tasty food, nice clothes ,jewelleries, make up, shoes and that too at lower prices. And for sure the monument of love Taj Mahal.
Our flight was scheduled at 10 a.m. We packed our most important items and our best clothes. Quickly we got ready & rushed to the airport. My parents came to bid farewell to me and they gave me some pocket money to buy things for myself & Inayat.
At first i didn’t wanted to take it but finally i took it because i didn’t want to hurt them. I know they have been making many sacrifices for me ever since i was born. Even i wanted to do something for them & help them financially but before i could prove that i could do something for them i got married. Inayat didn’t want a wife who work so i had to let go the idea of working.
Inayat & I went for check-in and we boarded the plane after greeting everyone from far. I hold his hand and walk along with him. I got a seat near window & Inayat was next to me. I was so excited & scared as well because that was the very first time i was travelling by plane. The plane took off,i held Inayat’s hand very firmly. I was making dua to Allah that i reach India safely as i was very nervous. In the plane we got lunch and snacks. I’m a foodie & coffee lover. So each time i was thirsty i would order for a hot coffee.
Our journey was quite long, and the next day when we arrived we were exhausted. From the airport we went directly to our hotel. But we had to travel a bit more because our hotel was really far from Delhi. My sister-in-law booked the hotel in Agra, really near to the Taj Mahal.
Once we got there, we checked in and we freshened up. Then went to bed as we had not slept in the plane & we had a long tiring journey. We woke up nearly at 3 p.m. We took a cold shower as it was so hot. Then we went to have tea in the restaurant. It was a really nice beginning of our stay in India.
In the evening Inayat had planned a wonderful candlelight dinner somewhere outside for me which was quite romantic. I really appreciate his efforts for whatever he has done. We had a bash that evening. And the meal was so tasty after all it was Indian food, my favorite.
After having such a romantic dinner, we went back to our hotel. We changed our clothes. Inayat was watching television & i was feeling bored sitting and doing nothing so i went to sit beside him. I hugged him, he hugged me back. Then i’ve put my head on his shoulders & kissed him on his neck. He took me in his arms and put me on the bed.
Finally our honeymoon was going to be successful. He touched me everywhere and kissed me all over. I felt as if i was on the 9th cloud. I gave my body, my soul, my everything to Inayat. I was all his. I could feel him, his warmth, his breath and his perfume.
My God, it all seems to be a dream but that was my reality, my life. We were like a happily married couple. That night was the most beautiful night of my life. I submitted myself to Inayat. Now my duty was to keep him happy, reduce his sorrows and stay by his side forever.
Chapter 4
The next day early in the morning we went for a walk. We then had breakfast in the open air garden. We were feeling so fresh & relaxing. It was purely natural. We had been so busy in our lives that we forgot the nature also exists.After a yummy & healthy breakfast we went to take a bath and get ready because we were about to go to visit the Taj Mahal. Then we set off for the Taj Mahal in a car van. The view from far was absolutely stunning. I was amazed.
Inayat was constantly looking at my smile, at times i would feel shy! Coming nearer that Taj Mahal looked so wonderful, so unique & it is consider to be among the 7 wonders of the world. The history is that the king Shahjahan built up this Taj Mahal for his wife Mumtaz whom he loved immensely.
It is said that the king has cut the hand of the builders so that they are not able to build such a Taj Mahal again. Shah Jahan & Mumtaz’s love was surely a history! We clicked many photos as souvenir and we roamed the all around. Everything looked so beautiful.
We then came back to the hotel and we went for a relaxing & peaceful massage which was too good. After taking a really long bath, Inayat & I went to have lunch in a restaurant found in Delhi. And the food in Delhi is just yummy, no word to describe the food over there.
When we returned to the hotel we went into our room and watched t.v then in the evening we went out for some shopping for ourselves & family members, buying clothes, jewellery, shoes, makeup, bags etc…and the time passed so quickly that we didn’t realise it was actually very late and it was time for dinner. But i was not feeling hungry as i had lunch quite late but Inayat was really hungry. I had only a cup of coffee as dinner…
After dinner, we went for a walk and we were having some romantic talks & kisses. I felt extremely lucky to have Inayat by my side, he was just a caring & loving husband. Everything seemed to be like a perfect dream. My honeymoon trip was going on very nicely.
The next morning we had to pack our luggage as it was time to go back to Mauritius. We were feeling sad to leave from there but we were also happy to have some great memories of India with us. During those few days i’ve enjoyed myself to the fullest and that will be a very special trip for me. We went directly to the airport after having breakfast.
Our journey was quite tiring but however i enjoy the company of Inayat so i didn’t feel that bore. We had lunch in the plane itself & we reached Mauritius late in the evening. Everyone came to pick up us at the airport we were amazed after seeing mom & dad, ma & pa (in laws) , sis & bro, sis & bro-in-laws, niece, nephews… i was so happy seeing all of them.
We went back home and actually i was so tired that the first thing i did was to take a shower & go to bed early. Neither i nor Inayat had dinner. Then Inayat came into the bedroom & brought a cup of hot coffee for me,he woke me up & made me drink it by saying that no one should go to bed empty stomach otherwise they’ll fall ill. And i shared my coffee with him. Then he hugged me and kissed me on my forehead & we both went to sleep.
The next morning Inayat had to go for a business meeting & he left a note on the side-table asking me not to worry about him and also to have breakfast on time. After breakfast i had to unpacked our suitcase & arranged our clothes properly as we would be sharing the same wardrobe from that day….
After one week i went to stay at my maayka for two days it was a part of tradition which our elder people used to believe in & Inayat had to stay over there too to accompany me and for the rituals as well. Infact, my maayka was just 15 minutes away from my in-laws so we had no trouble in going there.
Mom really loved her son-in-law and as soon as she saw Inayat she forgets about me. Hehehe but actually i was happy that mom and Inayat were really close to each other. Mom and dad really looked after Inayat, they didn’t make him feel that he was staying in his in-laws.
That evening mom was feeding Inayat with a variety of foods and he was enjoying and trying to make me jealous. Even i teased him by saying that ma&pa love me more. After dinner, we had coffee in the veranda and mom & dad were talking about my childhood with Inayat as he wanted to know about my childhood and adolescence. They were all laughing about how i was and i felt shy. It was not something to talk about me and specially in front of my husband. But however we had a great evening by talking.
Then i went to take a bath and by mistake i forgot my towel in the bedroom itself. I didn’t know how to go out and get it as i had no cloth on me. Then Inayat was passing by there i told him to bring my towel, he went to fetch it and gave it to me but at the same moment he was trying to be naughty by pulling me out of the bathroom. So i pushed him away and banged the door….
(*Maayka- maternal home)
After that we went to bed & Inayat was being very romantic. He was hugging me and he made love to me. We slept soon and the next morning we had to go back home as Inayat had to go for an urgent meeting and i preferred to return back with him than staying there alone.
Well, my parents were really happy to have spend a really good time with us. Arriving home i helped ma in preparing lunch as i was bored doing nothing all day. And then i watched t.v, drink coffee & that’s how my day would go on.
Sometimes, Inayat’s sister would come visit us & i used to play along with her kids when that evening they came ma & pa said that it’s time for them to become dada & dadi as they saw that i was too good with kids. Oh my God! It was too early for me to get pregnant, i just got married recently and i wanted to enjoy my married life, not having children so early.
I got so shy that i had to hide my face with my hand. I hated the fact that everyone was talking about me having a child when actually i didn’t want to have one. Inayat was saying that he gonna plan to have a baby soon which made me shy more that I had to rushed to the stairs & went into my room.
Chapter 5
My gosh! That was so embarassing for me & that too in front of everyone. I didn’t want to say anything that would hurt them so i came into my room silently. After a few minutes Inayat came behind me & hugged me while saying:
–“Sorry honey as i know you were not comfortable at all with the topic of “baby”.
–Then i said: “it’s ok, let it be now”
–Inayat answered: “i know that must have been awkward for you, but we like to joke and don’t take it seriously”
–I replied: “well i know that & just forget it and let’s go to sleep”
He gave me a beautiful rose & kissed me on my forehead and he turned off the light to sleep. And i was thinking of the things that happened. Somewhere i knew that whatever ma & pa said was true. They actually wanted to be dada & dadi. But i was not ready for it yet. The fact that i always wanted to be a good daughter-in-law made me feel guilty that i couldn’t fulfil their wish of becoming grandparents.
I thought much about it that night & finally the next day i told Inayat that i was ready for it but not really now.Maybe after a few months. He agreed to it and he made it clear that he won’t force me for anything.
After two days Zayaan came to meet me in my room while i was plying the clothes & he apologized to me for whatever he said in the past. And as his sister-in-law i just told him to forget about the thing that has ever happened because all that craps didn’t matter to me now as i’m someone’s else wife. He then went away without saying anything. Even i didn’t bother too much about him as for me only my husband mattered more than anything else in the world….
One year passed by and we celebrated our first wedding anniversary with great happiness. But during that 1 year many incident occurred, i lost my grandma (dadi) which was very painful for me. I was really closed to her that i was so affected by her death & i fell ill. And i miss her badly. Dad had a minor infection in his stomach and he had to stay at the clinic for two days. My nephew had to undergo an operation costing Rs35,000 & that little angel had to suffer so much from terrible pain.
But however, life goes on and everything was back on track. After six months i got to know that i was pregnant. Actually since the past two days i was not feeling well, i felt like vomiting and at times i felt dizzy so i did a pregnancy test because i had a delay in my menses. And the test was positive, when Inayat & the rest of the family members got to know about it, they were super excited. But just for confirmation we went to a good & well-known gynaeochologist.
The doctor confirmed that i was 1½ months pregnant. At that moment i was so happy that i got tears in my eyes. Being a mother is perhaps the greatest blessing in the world which maybe not everyone are fortunate to have it. Inayat kissed me on my cheeks and he said: ” baby you gave me all the happiness in the world today i love you so much”. Inayat was so happy, he wanted to shout & make the world know that he was going to be father and i was speechless had nothing to say because i got the best gift ever….
Whenever i would crave for something he would go & get it for me even if it’s midnight. He did bear all my tantrums & my stubbornness. He understands me completely & he adjust with me but he would never complained. I would get backache very often and that too at night & Inayat would wake up just to rub my back. He shared my pains.
Usually we would get sweet discussions about baby girl & baby boy. I wanted to get a boy but Inayat extremely liked baby girl. We would argue about it. But i knew whether it’s a baby girl or boy Inayat & i will love them equally. Now let’s see who wins! However, i was blessed to have a husband like him…
There was only 2 weeks left before my delivery. All the shopping were already done, for me and the baby as well. We didn’t choose colour according to the gender of the baby instead we bought colorful clothes & different types of toys. Inayat & i were not agree with the concept of doing an “echography”. We wanted it to be a surprise.But it’s obvious that i was nervous & scared. Inayat already planned the names of babies. He said if it’s a girl then he would name it Waliya or Waniya.
He really loved those names as their meanings are so lovely. One means ‘pearl’ & the other mean ‘princess’. Even i liked the names. They were quite rare. And if it’s a son then the name would be Armaan or Qais.
We had many dreams concerning the baby as it was our first baby, we wanted everything to be perfect. And we wanted to make sure our baby don’t lack anything. On Friday, i went for lunch at my mom’s place as she was requesting me to come since many days. I wanted to go but Inayat was busy with office work & he wouldn’t let me go alone. But that day he took a leave just to accompany me there. He is such a loving husband.
After having lunch, suddenly i got severe pain. Thankfully mom was there & she knew my water bag had already burst so she told Inayat to take me to the clinic immediately….
Alhamdulillah it was a baby boy. I had a normal delivery but due to the pain-killer injection i was unconscious for 1½ hours. As soon as i gain conscious i found my baby sleeping in my arms.
My tears roll down, it was the very first time i held him in my arms and that feeling is so unique. Before that, i could only feel him inside me & now he was in front of my eyes. I personally believe that being a mother is what completes a woman.
During visiting hours, Inayat came to see me & the baby. He was too excited that he had distributed sweets among the staff. When he came in the room he gave me a tight hug & congratulated me. I kissed him on his cheek & congratulates him too. We decided that the little prince name would be “Armaan”.
I had to stay for one night observation along with the baby. But there was nothing to worry because it was just casually. The baby was fit & weight 2.9 kg. I was fine too but just a little tired.
The next morning hubsy love came to pick me up as i got discharged from the clinic. And he was well groomed as if he was going to attend a wedding. Maybe that was the happiness of being a father.
Arriving home, everyone was there even mom & dad, sis & bil and their kids, bro. Inayat’s sisters and brother-in-laws was there too. I was so happy to see them all. Their presence doubled my happiness. But the thing that disturbed me was that Zayaan wasn’t happy at all, he was looking at us strangely, maybe he wanted to say something but he wasn’t able.
Anyway, all my family was here and that mattered more. Everyone wanted to carry the baby in their arms, they wanted to play with him. Seeing them like that made me feel that i gave them the happiness they truly deserved…
Chapter 6
Armaan brought along with him lots of happiness & blessings for all of us. Everybody loved him. They used to peeped in my room and stole Armaan from his craddle & play with him. At first it was quite scary i would wonder where could Armaan go as he can’t go anywhere alone. But then ma told me Armaan is with her. I was really lucky to have got such in-laws,they take care of me and my baby. That was more than enough for me.
Inayat then became very busy after the birth of Armaan. He was working on a projectwhich was very important for his company. He would get angry over little things & he would yell at me or say things which really hurt. He would get irritated with the cry of Armaan specially in the midnight when Armaan would wake up to drink milk. Inayat would shout at me as he can’t sleep for nights and he had lots of work pressure. It was becoming difficult for me to bear all these things, the baby, the house, Inayat & his anger.
I found that my responsibilities were increasing & Inayat was not corperating with me like a husband should do. I really need him even Armaan needed his father by his side. Finally, one night i end up crying endlessly. He woke up of a sudden and asked me what happened. I cried & cried but i didn’t reply him.
He then said :
– “baby why are you crying? What happened? All okay no? Are you still upset with me?”
– “baby why are you crying? What happened? All okay no? Are you still upset with me?”
I did not say anything but i wiped away my tears & stay silent.
He spoke again :
–“look i’m really sorry dear it’s just the pressure of work, i’m trying my best to achieve this project so that you & Armaan stay happy and that you are proud of me. I know it’s difficult for you but please only a few days more & then everything will be back to normal”
–“look i’m really sorry dear it’s just the pressure of work, i’m trying my best to achieve this project so that you & Armaan stay happy and that you are proud of me. I know it’s difficult for you but please only a few days more & then everything will be back to normal”
Then i replied :
–“we want nothing but your presence, we want you now & forever. I know you’re doing all this for us but try to umderstand i need your company. Armaan needs his father”
–“we want nothing but your presence, we want you now & forever. I know you’re doing all this for us but try to umderstand i need your company. Armaan needs his father”
Inayat said :
–“even i want to be with you guys but i can’t, i’m helpless. For now only my project means a lot and i assure you will be the happiest one to know what i had achieved”
–“even i want to be with you guys but i can’t, i’m helpless. For now only my project means a lot and i assure you will be the happiest one to know what i had achieved”
I was speechless! I had no words or reaction. Then he gave me a tight hug & said sorry after kissing me on my forehead and then we fell asleep after cuddling with each other….
Inayat’s behaviour remained the same for the past days. Finally after two weeks, he returned from office with a huge smile on his face & then he announced that he was promoted from assistant manager to the branch manager of his bank in London.
He said that we have to shift over there within four days. I stood still. Four days, how can it be possible? What are we going to do! I was worried. I went back to my room silently, then Inayat came looking for me.
He was too excited & hugged me from the back and he whispered in my ears :
–“baby you still remember the project i was telling you, now my project was mainly considered & i’ve been chosen as the branch manager. Can you imagine my love, we’re going to England”
I sat on the bed & replied in a soft voice :
–“but how can we shift over there i mean how are we going to manage? We know nobody there,it’s a new place. And Armaan is too young”
He tried to make me comfortable and said :
– “don’t you worry, my company is bearing all the costs for the travel & they are providing accommodation for us as well and you won’t have any difficulty as we’ll be staying in an open area, there is full security”
I felt relieved and then i just nodded my head saying okay & i congratulate him. Then we started preparing for England. We had less time to manage everything. We bought 4 big suitcases & two handbags. There was too many clothes for us and we had to buy more warm clothes for Armaan.
I was so sad before going, i was wondering that only the three of us shall stay there and that too forever. Inayat would go to office everyday and i’ll be alone at home looking after Armaan. It was so heartbreaking for me leaving my family & my house behind.
At the airport everyone was crying and i didn’t want to go but it was late & our flight was already announced. Inayat grabs my hand and we walk together to check-in. In the plane i cried but Inayat tried to reason with me that we’ll come back during holidays. He wiped away my tears and kissed me….
I had been so busy that i forgot to make call to Mauritius. In fact since we’ve been there only once i’ve called to let my family know that we reached well. But i did make video call with them that evening and Inayat was back from office quite early. So we had a family video chat. After that it was dinner time and i was too tired to cook so Inayat said he gonna take me out for dinner as he came back early and he wanted to spend lots of time with us. I got ready quickly and make Armaan dressed properly so that he don’t fall sick again. We went to a fine indian restaurant where the food is absolutely outstanding and i just love it.
Armaan had his baby meal. Overall we had a really good time altogether that too after a long time. I was so delighted. When we returned back i’ve put Armaan to sleep and then changed my clothes and went to make coffee for myself.
He came behind me and gave me a sudden hug and kissed me on my necks. As usual he is a bit naughty. I started feeling nostalgic and thinking about our romantic moments in Mauritius. I just miss those days. Then he went to watch tv as there was a football match going on. Maybe that was his only relaxation time so i didn’t disturbed him. I just drank my coffee and went to bed, he came in very soon and he was so tired that he took some sleeping pills before going to sleep so that he can sleep well…
Everything changed for me. London was totally different from Mauritius; their lifestyles, food, dressing sense almost everything. Sometimes i would feel awkward. Inayat work was a bit reduced after three weeks. And he was now finally settled at work as well as at home. He had more free time for himself. One evening he came back early and he freshened up to come and help me in the kitchen for dinner. I found it surprising but loving too.
After helping me a bit he went to play with Armaan & i was happy seeing him like that. Then it was dinner time and we ate together & Inayat bought a bouquet for me. I washed the dishes while Inayat disappeared somewhere else. I kept calling him and then he came out saying :-
– “i’ve already put Armaan to sleep you don’t worry and don’t go in the room for now, there is a surprise for you & please don’t ruin it and wait here don’t move hmm“
I looked at him in a shocking way, i was wondering what surprise must he be talking about. And he put Armaan to sleep, that was a bit suspicious. He then brought a packet and when i opened it i found a sexy dress in it. He asked me to wear it and just to please him i went to change my clothes in the bathroom.
As soon as i came out he blindfolded my eyes and hold my hands and walk along with me to the room. By my great surprise our bedroom was well decorated with red rose petal and candles. Romantic mood totally. Inayat hugged me & he kissed me on my lips, my neck and all over. I let go all of myself and i was drown in his eyes.
He made love to me and that was the moment when i felt that now everything will be alright and we’ll be more closer to each other as there was something missing in our relationship since we came to London. Maybe we didn’t have much time for each other.
The next morning Inayat was still in a romantic mood. He woke up before me and he was drawing lines on my back just to make me have sensation and also to tease me. That’s one of his old habits.
Suddenly he got a phone call from his office and he had to get ready fast. So i went to make breakfast for him. He ate quickly and went out without greeting me. That did hurt a little however i can understand him.
Months went by and everyday i got myself busy in a new thing just to not feel bored and our 2nd wedding anniversary was coming nearer so i started planning something extraordinary and that too without informing Inayat about it i wanted to give him a really good surprise….
It was finally my 2nd wedding anniversary and that day i pretend as if i have forgotten about it. I wanted Inayat to wish me first but it seems that he was too busy to even remember what date was it!
He went to office, after that i started cleaning the whole apartment and it was looking good. Since afternoon i’ve been cleaning and decorating. I wanted to give him a really good surprise so i decided to prepare a delicious dinner for Inayat simply romantic. I wanted to bake a cake in chocolate flavour,his favourite. I even left Armaan at a muslim neighbour place so that i get time to do everything.
It was already evening luckily i finished all the work in time it was 08:00 p.m, the time for Inayat to come back home. I switched off the light & light up the candles and waited for him. It was nearly 10p.m and he was not back. Even the candles were melt. I thought he must have been in trouble because it was too late.
So i phoned him and his phone was coming busy. After a few seconds i got a message saying that “baby i’ll be home in a few hours, just have your dinner and don’t worry i have the keys so you may go to bed” .
I wondered that he may be coming soon so i waited for him. I fell asleep on the couch itself. Nearly 04:00a.m i heard the door opened. And it was Inayat coming back home. He was too tired and exhausted. He was surprised to see me in the hall and he wondered what i was doing and what is the occasion for dinner, cake and decoration. He then remembered that it was our wedding anniversary yesterday. He came next to me and hold my hands saying sorry. And he was about to wish me that i walked away and went to throw the food in the dustbin. I was so upset & angry as well.
*wasting food is haraam in Islam but it was exposed to flies and all that so i had to throw it as it was contaminated.
After that i went directly in the baby’s room and slept over there. I woke up very early and went away from home. I went to the nearby park and sat over there. It was quite cold. And i was thinking how my life has changed so much. Almost 2hours i stayed there and at last i caught cold & i had to return back home. Inayat was gone but he called twice on my phone and he left a message on the landline.
I went to fetch Armaan but as Shania(my neighbour) hold my hands to greet me, she said that i had fever. She checked my temperature and it was 38.5° so she gave me a pill just for my fever to decrease. And she suggest that i leave Armaan at her place otherwise Armaan would fall ill too.
At first i was hesitating but she convinced me. That day i got high fever i was unable to move from bed. But Shania came twice to give me lunch and to check if i was taking the medicines….
Chapter 7
I don’t know how but Inayat came to know that i was sick & he was back home early. He rushed to see me in the bedroom and he was shocked to see my state. I was totally hot with fever i couldn’t even say a word and i was shivering out of cold.He was confused, he didn’t know what to do then he decided to take me to the hospital because my condition was not good at all. There, the doctor treated me well and my fever was a bit low and i was feeling much better. As soon as i opened my eyes Inayat was already present in the room and holding my hands tightly and there was tears in his eyes. I removed my hand because i didn’t want to talk to him. I was still upset and angry. He then ask for forgiveness and i melt down by hugging him and crying as well. I was very hurt for what he has done but finally i forgave him and everything was back to normal. He stayed in the hospital for the whole night and he took great care of me.
After one night observation it was time to go back home. I was fine but still a little weakness. At home Inayat strictly warn me not to get off the bed and that he will take care of everything. I agreed quietly. Afterall it’s very rare that your husband ask you not to do any household chores. I took advantage of the situation.
Armaan was at Shania place in a good mood as well i could hear him laughing and playing loudly from my bedroom. I was really missing him & wanted to meet him but i fear that he gets fever too so i preferred let down the idea of meeting him.
During the whole day Inayat was there looking after me and asking me from time to time what i needed. For every little thing i needed to ask him for his permission otherwise he would scold me. However, my day went on like that…
Everything was back to normal. I got my Inayat and he was all mine. Our relationship was a bit sour & sweet. Sometimes we would get into huge arguments and sometimes we would make love.
We really missed our hometown but usually we used to spoke to our family through skype and viber. But it is not the same compared to if we were there with them. Mom & dad would send us gifts for Eid and our birthdays and Armaan was the most to benefit from it as every month his dada would send transfer an amount of money in his bank account.
Armaan started speaking and his first word was “mamma”. That emotional feeling when first time your kid call you ‘mom’. It is surely magical. He started walking slowly and he was too cute.
Months went by and Armaan was growing quickly. He got adapted there and finally he was 3 years old and we celebrated his birthday among friends and neighbours. His grandparents watched him celebrating from the skype.
He speaks in the English and Urdu language. As i was giving private tuition in Urdu Language at home itself, Armaan would learn from it. But he speaks in broken language as he has yet to learn and understand. Everytime Inayat comes back from the office either he brings chocolates or toys for Armaan. And that little prince was becoming a brat. We really loved him and we always fulfil his every wishes. Inayat told me maybe it is the time for us to plan for another baby. Even i agreed because it was important for Armaan to know how to share his things with others and he was becoming very naughty.
One morning it was raining heavily Inayat & i had to go out for some legal works so we left Armaan at Shania’s place. We were driving smoothly when suddenly Inayat couldn’t see anything properly and he lost his control, he just crash against a tree and the car did many flips. After that i don’t remember anything. I was unconscious for many hours.
Some people who were present on the spot took us to the hospital. I got scratches everywhere and i fractured my arms. I had to put on plaster. And when i gained conscious i found out the most painful thing ever that i had a miscarriage and Inayat died in the accident. I didn’t want to believe this but when they took me near Inayat’s body i panicked as it was himself.
I burst into tears i couldn’t imagine my life without him. I was broken. I could not understand what do i do. My life seems to be ending in front of my eyes. I cursed my destiny for whatever happened. I continued crying and crying.
When i heard someone’s baby crying i remembered Armaan so i went to phoned Shania and she told me that my mom & dad was here. I was surprised but i thank Allah for sending them at the right time as i really needed them.
I told her to bring them at the hospital quickly. When mom came i couldn’t resist i just hugged her tight and cry endlessly. She was so worried and she was searching for Inayat then the doctor took her to the body. She was broken too & dad had to handle her. Dad knew that Inayat won’t come back.
Somewhere i thought that i am to be blamed. Why did all this happened, why?? I wanted to end up my life but then i thought about Armaan he just lost his father and what will happened to him. I just lost a baby and i didn’t even know that i was pregnant. Why? Everything was going on well then why this accident?
Dad said that we shall go back to Mauritius right away and he organised for an aircraft so that we could go back. Mom and Shania went at home to do the packing. They packed all the things.
Shania said that she will sell the things we can’t take back with us and she’ll send me the money by post. But i didn’t want anything. I just wanted my Inayat back….
We reached Mauritius along with Inayat’s body. And we perfomed the mayyat over there. I didn’t talk to anyone,i wanted to be alone in the darkness that’s where exactly Inayat left me, in the dark.
All those who came to the mayyat were feeling pity for me and they were talking among themselves but i was their target. I didn’t speak a single word. Ma & pa came and they were so sad thinking that i’ll be all alone.
But i had Armaan with me, mine & Inayat’s love symbol. I could live the rest of my life with my son but as everyone says a child needs a mother but he needs a father too. That is where my tears roll down my cheeks.
Why can’t Armaan have his father by his side? Is he going to stay like this all his life? What will i tell him when he grow older? How do i answered all his questions? How? How? How?
Those questions were running on my mind and i had no idea what the answers would be. When Inayat’s body was about to leave from the house and go to the qabarastan i was crying loudly,i couldn’t control myself.
But then we had to pray and pray for him so i just focus on that and it was already night. The family members were so upset they didn’t even had dinner. But as dad explained that those who are gone won’t come back again so there is no use in crying for someone who is no more.
They ate a little. But i didn’t have dinner until my brother came to talk with me and told me that i’m too young to be disapointed with life. I shall look after my son but doing that all alone would be hard & difficult. So the best is that i get remarried.
Remarried? Yes i heard it right. But why? I mean i just lost my husband and they are thinking of getting me remarried? Is it fair enough for me or is it a betrayal towards Inayat?
I just felt like slapping my brother but then i calmly asked him to go out from my room as i wanted to be alone. He went away because he could understand my feeling & situation.
Armaan was carefree, he was playing and having fun he didn’t know what was happening and Zayaan was looking after him throughout the whole day. It was very late in the night. Everyone was tired so they went to sleep. Whereas i was sitting near the window looking at the stars ★ and wondering why did Inayat left me. I was feeling sad & totally broken, i wanted to talk to him and feel him. Just then i felt a light breeze passing off my face with a frangrant smell. Maybe it was a sign for me that Inayat will always remain with me in my heart and my life…
It was already 5 months and my iddat was over. Everyday i would think about Inayat and obviously with tears in my eyes.
One Monday we were out for grocery shopping at the supermarket when i met my childhood best friend Sameer. I was overjoyed to see him after ten years. He was not in Mauritius during those 10 years as his parents were settled in Canada for job and he had to migrate over there. Sameer and i were very close to each other as we’ve grown up together in the same locality, same school and even same college. We used to share our happiness, sorrows, problems, solutions and even our meal. But since he went to Canada we lost contact completely.
Mom & dad didn’t want to embarassed me so they went ahead and i was with Sameer. Then the question and answer session began:
Sameer-“so what have you done during these 10 years?”
Me-“oh nothing much just that i completed my Urdu Language Course and i was graduated”
Sameer-“that’s awesome and finally you did what you wanted”
Me-(with a smile on my face)
“Yes finally, anyway you tell me where is your wife?”
“Yes finally, anyway you tell me where is your wife?”
Sameer-“hehe you must be kidding, i’m not married yet”
Me-“what? But….”
Sameer-“chill dude, i’m still in search of my queen”
Me-“hope you get married soon”
Sameer-“In Sha Allah! You tell me. Have you got married or still waiting for your prince charming?”
Me-(with a pale face and sadness)
“Actually my husband died in a car accident five months ago & i have a 3 years old son”
“Actually my husband died in a car accident five months ago & i have a 3 years old son”
Sameer-(shocked)
“What? But how i mean i’m sorry i didn’t know about it”
“What? But how i mean i’m sorry i didn’t know about it”
Me-“that’s okay don’t worry and by the way it was really nice meeting you but for now i’m a bit busy as i’m with my in-laws so we’ll catch up later if you don’t mind and give me your number”
Sameer-“same here oh that’s not a problem you may go okay i’ll text you”
I went with mom and we continued with our shopping. Don’t know where dad disappeared and after nearly 15 minutes he came. Then we were done so we returned home… The following week end nearly 17:00 p.m i was busy bathing Armaan while dad was constantly calling me downstairs and as i finished i went to see why he was calling me.
Just then mom said she had ordered indian food from my favourite restaurant which is Sameer’s favourite restaurant as well. He was overjoyed. Then we were remembering our childhood and we were being nostalgic.
The time passed so quickly that we didn’t realised. The delivery boy came to deliver the food and we went into the dining room where i served the food. We all sat together and ate the yummy food. After that we ate ice-cream as dessert. Armaan was jumping around. He was actually very happy.
That evening Armaan was playing with Zayaan and don’t know how he called Zayaan “dad” i was shocked and scold him by saying that Zayaan is not his father and that too in a very angry tone. He got scared & he was crying. I ran to my room in tears.
Sameer came in my room to talk to me and said:
“Zakiyah i know you lost your husband but Armaan lost his father too & he isn’t aware of that yet so you should not scold him”
I replied: “i know but i didn’t do that intentionally and if he was anyone else i wouldn’t matter but it’s Zayaan, the love whom…..”
Sameer: “oh i got it don’t worry i’ll convince Armaan”
Me: “thank you but he’ll be fine don’t bother yourself”
Sameer: “shall i tell you something”
Me: “yeah sure go ahead”
Sameer: “first promise me you won’t be angry & secondly you’ll think about it”
Me: “okay promise now speak on”
Sameer: “see i know your situation & i understand your feeling, it’s just that i want to accept you & Armaan as a part of my family. I want to spend the rest of my life with you in fact we know each other very well so you can probably understand what i’m saying. It’s not for you but for Armaan who needs a father & i promise i’ll try to be the best dad for him but please think about it & i hope your answer will be yes”
Me: (shocked & speechless)
Sameer: “the last time we met at the supermarket your dad did talk to me & he said that he wants to see you happy & smiling again but he needed my help and as he saw that you were really happy to see me he invited me for dinner so that i could talk to you about this in case you will be ready for this relationship, now it’s up to you and think about it properly”
Me: “i need time”
Sameer: “take all your time i’ll be waiting for you but for now it’s too late,i think i should leave now, bye goodnight salaam”
Me: “goodnight & salaam”
I was left alone in the darkness again. Mom & dad came to see me & they insist that i say yes not only for their sake or for Armaan but for myself. They said that i needed someone’s company to move on in life. But i didn’t know what answer will i give to Sameer. I kept on thinking the whole night….
Chapter 8
The following morning, i phoned Sameer and asked him if we could meet to discuss. He told me to come to meet him in his flat. So i went. As i rang the bell, he opened the door. I went inside & he made me feel comfortable. He even brought me my favourite coffee. Just after drinking it.
He asked : “so have you thought about what i said yesterday”.
I hesitated and then i said : “i want to be very clear about this so i will tell you frankly. I actually don’t want to get married because for me marriage is not a boat that i climb on one when the other is sinking. I want to be independent and look after my son but we are living in a society whereby a woman should always depend on a man. It’s just that i don’t want other people to look at my son as an orphan so i’m ready to get marry to you but only for the sake of my son, nothing more. See Sameer you’re my bestfriend since childhood and i don’t want to complicate our relationship. I hope you understand and if there is any problem do let me know”
Sameer was speechless for a couple of seconds then he kneed down with a rose in his hand & said :”i agree because i trust you & i’m ready to be Armaan’s father and your companion in this journey of life”. I blushed away and told him to come at home and ask my hand from my in-laws. He even dropped me home and he said that it would be better to talk about the proposal on other day. I was constantly thinking about Armaan’s future and i thought that maybe i made the right decision but i wasn’t sure. I was missing Inayat so much that i was thinking if he was in my shoes what he would have done. Then i got my answer because Inayat was my better-half & our thinking was so similar. I smiled and said to myself that yes i made the right decision.
After two days, Sameer came to ask for my hand. Mom & dad agreed happily because they always wanted me to be happy and they thought that maybe my happiness was found in Sameer. They even asked ma & pa about their decision, even they agreed!
Everything was sorted out and dad said the nikah will happen in exactly one month. Everyone was elated by this news. Then Sameer went to meet Armaan, no wonder what he was talking to him but Armaan seemed to be excited & happy. And he had that cunning smile on his face and he looked so cute. Later on, i text Sameer and told him that i want our nikah to be very simple with few people and few expenditures. He said whatever you wish will happen in that way itself….
In the evening we had a small dinner together and it went well. Even Armaan was happy, he run here & there shouting out that he has a Dad now. Seeing him like this made me forget about my pain and made me smile again. Then it was time for Rukhsat, i cried heartfully. The journey was quite tiring. Arriving at Sameer’s flat, everything seemed to be new for me. And it was actually quite irritating. Because i got used to my house. It was difficult for me. So he showed me around and he told me to rest in the bedroom.
As i opened the door i saw the room filled with petals of roses candles and vanilla perfume. It seems so romantic but it made me stressed out a bit because Sameer knew we wouldn’t keep any physical relationship. Just then Sameer came in & apologised on behalf of his parents who made these arrangements. I felt awkward. Then he removed all the petals and turn off all the candles & arranged the bedsheet properly so that i can sleep well.
I thanked him, and he went outside. I changed my clothes in a hurry and got into the bed. Sameer came and he said he’ll be sleeping on the sofa bed in the room itself till i don’t get myself used to be comfortable with him. And frankly speaking i really appreciate his efforts. He made me melt so i told him, there is no need for all this and that he can sleep on the bed itself because it is his bedroom. Armaan slept in his grandparents room as he was really exhausted.
I slept till late in the morning, Sameer came to wake me up and it was nearly 11 o’clock. I felt guilty, as i wanted to prepare breakfast for everyone. Then Sameer said that mom & dad went back to Canada by the 4 a.m flight as they’ve got an urgent call. I wondered why Sameer didn’t told me.
He then said :”you were looking damn cute while sleeping & i didn’t wanted to wake you up so i went to drop them”.
I blushed away. Then got up & went to take a bath and had to settled Armaan’s room.
Sameer was helping us and it was lunch time so i prepared something really light & less spicy which Sameer & Armaan really liked. Then we were talking generally while having lunch….
Sameer behaved like a really good friend with me & he did not let me missed my ex in-laws & my parents. After our Nikah we didn’t went to meet them & it was mostly two months. I was missing them badly but couldn’t say anything to Sameer. I doubted he’ll be upset.
And it happened that one day after coming back from doing the shopping i reached home and i found my all of them in my flat. I was amazed, still thinking what are they doing here. They told me Sameer had invited them for dinner. Each one of them brought a small present for me, it was really heart touching!
We had an amazing evening altogether. It was fun! Most of all i liked the way everyone was smiling and happy. It took a little long but maybe my decision was right. But the thing that was troubling me was that my mother & father-in-law didn’t actually liked my interaction with my ex in-laws. I don’t know why but whenever i talk about Armaan’s grandparents to them, they feel uncomfortable even though they are not in the same country, of course Sameer’s dad is in Canada & managing his business.
I tried to talk to Sameer but our communication skills were very less so there was no point in discussing all this. Armaan had already joined the primary school as he’ll be five soon. The little prince wanted everything in blue color. So one Sunday Sameer & i went to the stationary supermarket to buy his bag, shoes, uniforms, books, play stuff etc…
After buying Armaan’s stuff, we went to the park and Armaan was playing & having fun with Sameer. They were both really cute together. Sameer never forced me for anything but i would get bored at home, one day i told him i want to work. As my husband, he knew my skills so he applied for teacher on my behalf and i got a letter very soon. I joined a primary school where i would teach “urdu language”.
Everything had fallen into place, i used to work in the same school of Armaan so we would go to school together & come back together. During lunch break i would look after him and see that he eats his lunchbox. And there Sameer would managed his office works and at night i used to help him for any paper work or any presentation. I would be really helpful to him.
Sometimes Sameer would remain out of town for his business. Armaan & i would go to visit his grandparents on weekends and we would have lunch over there. Every time Armaan would meet them, they would spoil him with foods, gifts and toys & that little prince would really take advantage of it and asked for more. Little greedy!
Sameer and my relationship grew stronger day by day; filled with love and trust. No one would say that he was actually my 2nd husband for he made a wonderful husband for me & a wonderful father for Armaan! He took great care of me & Armaan, he did not let us miss anything. He would give us all the comfort needed even if we didn’t ask about it.
Some months went by and soon i found out that i was pregnant. I was so delighted and i announced this good news to Sameer in front of Armaan by telling him that there is going to be a baby soon in the house. Both were shocked and look at each other. Then Sameer finally spoke up:
-” oh habibi,is that true?”
I was a bit shy and replied in a smooth voice:
-“yes, we’re going to have a child”
He was so excited he was jumping around like a kid himself. He took me in his arms and kissed me. And he thanked me for this wonderful surprise.
Armaan came near me and said:
-“mom it means i’m going to be an elder brother so i must be more responsible & i should take care of you now my sweet mom,you don’t worry i’ll be with you everytime” I was touched by his words that tears of happiness rolled down my cheeks. I hugged him tightly and gave him a kiss…
During my pregnancy Sameer took immense care of me. He was always there to see whether i need anything or for every little things he would ask me. He handled Armaan and the house as well along with his office work.
Actually when we went to the gyneochologist, she told me that there is going to be a bit complication in my pregnancy as i’ve had a miscarriage earlier so this time i would have to take lots of precaution and lots of rest. I should tire myself so much. But for me i used to get bored lying down and doing nothing. I would walk around and look somethig to do.
However Sameer would be really angry with me. But i’m also very stubborn so i would stay with Armaan and look after his school work. I had to take maternity leave from the school, and stay at home. Sameer was always there for me at any time and at times my mom & dad would come to meet me. Months passed by, my delivery date was coming nearer. I would feel restless everyday and nervous as well.
One fine afternoon, after doing ghusl i was about to read namaaz when i realised my water bag had burst i screamed so loud,Sameer came to see me quickly. He took me to the clinic immediately. There was a bit complications & i had to undergo a C-section which was quite painful. After much effort i heard the crying of the baby, the doctor announced it was a baby girl. After that i fainted.
After 4 hours i regained conscious, everyone was present in my room specially Sameer had a wonderful smile on his face and he brought the baby to me & i was able to take my daughter in my arms. She was so tiny & rosy. Too cute and lovely. Tears of happiness poured out of my face. Armaan sat on the bed and hugged me. Sameer wanted to name the baby “Zeisha” so i agreed. I felt this was the time my family was completed…
************______________*************
Zayaan was just an infatuation..it was just an attraction during my youth,everyone tend to make mistakes so did I.
Zayaan was just an infatuation..it was just an attraction during my youth,everyone tend to make mistakes so did I.
Inayat was my first love because true love happens only after nikah!
My first love, I’ll never forget, and it’s such a big part of who I am, and in so many ways, we could never be together, but that doesn’t mean that it’s not forever. Because it is forever.
However Sameer was my unforgettable love because we we’re destined to be together ever since childhood. Just that the right time didn’t come at a perfection but yes whatever is meant to be yours will always find its way
I can’t live without him now,
What’s my existence without him.. If I get separated from him,
I’ll be separated from my own self.. because he is my life. There is his name on every breath of mine.
Some love stories live forever
My love for him is unique surely!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
♡EVERYONE HAS AN UNFORGETTABLE LOVE♡
I can’t live without him now,
What’s my existence without him.. If I get separated from him,
I’ll be separated from my own self.. because he is my life. There is his name on every breath of mine.
Some love stories live forever
My love for him is unique surely!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
♡EVERYONE HAS AN UNFORGETTABLE LOVE♡
*The End*
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